Holding on can be painful. Holding on can directly contribute to stress, health complications, unhappiness, depressive thoughts, relationship problems, and so on.
Yet, as human beings, we cling desperately to almost everything
We don’t like change, so we resist it.
We want life to be the way we think it “should” be.
So how can we stop holding on?
By realizing that there’s nothing to hold on to in the first place.
Most of the things we desperately try to hold on to, as if they’re real, solid, everlasting fixtures in our lives, aren’t really there. Or if they are there in some form, they’re changing, fluid, impermanent, or simply imagined in our minds.
Today I challenge you to ask yourself:
- What are you desperately trying to hold on to in your life?
- How is it affecting you?
Then imagine the thing you’re trying to hold on to doesn’t really exist. Envision yourself letting go… and just floating.
How would that change your situation?
Think about it carefully, and then remind yourself of why it’s time to let GO:
- When you let go, you allow yourself to make the best of what you’ve got. – A big part of your ability to be happy and successful in the long run relies on your willingness to let go of what you think your life is supposed to be like right now, sincerely appreciate it for everything that it is, and then make the very best of it.
- When you let go, you get to use your resources more effectively. – Holding on is like wanting to control the uncontrollable. Letting go and allowing uncontrollable things to happen, on the other hand, means these things will take care of themselves naturally, and your needs can also be better met in the process. At the very least, you will have less stress (and less to do), and more time and energy to focus on the things that truly matter – the things you actually can control – like your attitude about everything.
- When you let go, you free your mind from needless worries. – When you are lost in worry, it’s easy to mistake your worries for reality, instead of recognizing that they are just thoughts. Do your best to be mindful. Let your presence expand and your overthinking shrink. Accept what is, let go of what was, and have faith in the present possibilities.
- When you let go, you learn more about how life really works. – When you hold on to how things “should” be, and attempt to control the uncontrollable, you automatically block yourself from the truth. You resist how everything works rather than learning about it. The key is to educate yourself about your present circumstances and then work smarter with what you’ve got. (Marc and I discuss this further in the “Adversity” chapter of 1,000 little Things Happy, Successful People do differently).
- When you let go, you get to appreciate others for who they truly are. – It’s about loosening up and learning to appreciate different perspectives, lifestyles, and opinions, even if it means overcoming your ego and opening your mind beyond what’s comfortable. It’s about letting those you care about be unapologetically themselves, and not distorting them to fit your own egotistical idea of who you think they “should” be.
- When you let go, you get to focus less on pleasing others, and more on just doing the best you can. – How often has your life been driven by the misunderstandings and judgments of others? And how often have these misunderstandings and judgments disappointed you or stressed you out, because you thought you could control the way everyone sees you? The truth is most people will see what they want to see whether you worry about it or not. It’s time to let go of trying to control how everyone perceives you. It’s time to just do the best you can.
